My Rojak and Cocktail

Warning Signs !

2009-11-07T15:25:45Z

On a lawnmower I had was a big label which read: "WARNING WHEN MOTOR IS RUNNING- THE BLADE IS TURNING!" We once bought a grocery store pizza and the instruction were on the bottom, so we turned it upside down to see how long to cook it etc., and...

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

VENDING MACHINES

2009-11-02T14:51:00Z

An American salesman checked into a futuristic hotel in Tokyo, Japan. Realizing he needed a haircut before the next day's meeting, he called down to the desk clerk to ask if there was a barber on the premises. "I'm afraid not, sir," the clerk to...

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Stop redundancy

2009-10-29T14:31:40Z

The Committee for the Reduction of Redundancy and the Anti proliferation of Repetition has decided not to meet until they have their first meeting and thus will not be meeting until the first time. Their Pre-meeting Statement wanted to make this...

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Ten Things That You Should Never Say to a Ghost

2009-10-24T13:24:22Z

Ghosts are scary. They move around freely in mansions. They just love to say “Boo” and watch you run away in fright. Here is a list of some things that you should never say to a ghost: Nice sheet. Did you get it from Martha Stewart? Hey giv...

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Funniest Leave Letters ever Written

2009-10-21T14:10:15Z

1. Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave. 2. This is from Oracle Bangalore: From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son: "as I want to shave my ...

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

A Mess of Puns

2009-10-15T14:33:00Z

When she saw her first gray hair, she thought she'd dye. A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative. Freudian slip. When you say one thing and mean your mother. A hangover is the wrath of grapes. I used to work in a blanket factory but it fo...

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Employer Talk

2009-10-11T15:04:15Z

We're all fluent in this modern language. It's what we use when we want to exaggerate a little bit on our resumes or applications. It's also what we adopt when we're looking for a new person to join our company -- or not. Here's one interpretati...

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Deep Thoughts

2009-10-08T14:59:41Z

Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis. Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind." Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "m...

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Oxymorons

2009-10-05T14:55:57Z

51. Holy war 50. Act naturally 49. Found missing 48. Resident alien 47. Advanced BASIC 46. Genuine imitation 45. Airline Food 44. Good grief 43. Same difference 42. Almost exactly 41. Government organization 40. Sanitary landfill 39....

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Instructions

2009-10-03T14:24:05Z

Instructions On instructions for a hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. On a bar of Dial bath bar: Directions: Use like regular soap. On a frozen dinner...

Read and post comments | Send to a friend